Marriage

On Saturday 20th and Sunday 21st October, I witnessed two friends of mine get married. It was a breathtaking moment, and for me, it was even more intense because I was strongly involved in their ceremonies. On 20th, I was a bestman, a role I intend to take on forever, and on 20th, I was chair of the organising committee. That is a small role, but with a less dynamic person, it can lead to the total failure of a function. Why do I write about these which I think are most times seen as trivial issues? Well, there is a lot about these two weddings that came to the bottom of my heart. Marriage for me has always been a serious thing. Ever since I got married, I have been a more focused person, looking at things from a totally different perspective. I have realised it is not just about one person, but it is about the other person. Marriage is sacrifice and for me that is what makes me more determined to stay there. I told a friend of mine some time back that each time I see an aging couple, I determine to stay married. But, every time I see people join the most honourable institution, I desire that they get to where I am and even grow old with the person they have walked down the aisle with. Marriage is a lifetime commitment and that is what makes it serious. For me, it is something not to be gotten into without prior thought and surety that this is what I want and nothing else. So, when I saw my friends get married, I was reminded of my own vows. I was reminded of the commitment I made to my wife. I was reminded of the decision I made that changed the rest of my life forever. I thought much more about these fellows at the stage I am and then thought of where they would go years after. I still remember telling them: You are in here for a reason: Love your wife forever, and stay married for life. Ours is a generation that has wrong models when it comes to marriage. we see celebrities divorce each passing day. Funnily, we seem to think it is ok to walk in and out of relationships. I have read stories of those that have survived marriage for 50 and more years and theirs has always been an inspirational story. I choose to look at those that have moved on and on instead of trying to look for a way out. I have chosen to love my wife regardless of any rocks that hit us. I have chosen to make my marriage work even when I have not had the best of a family life before marriage. When we get married, we start a life journey. It is not as simple as we always assume. It is a life of teaching and learning. I have learnt to be mpre patient and humble (yes, marriage humbles the man in us). Most of all, I have learnt to love my wife and God more. Each day I put it before Him and that makes me move on and on. So, the next time I see a friend get married, I will smile and laugh my way out. I will wish my friend a life of great happiness and recommit to my wife, my vows and most of all my God. I will love my wife more because that is God's holy command. I choose to see others happy in marriage. But most of all, I am inspired to stay married no matter what the cost. That is the little message I can have after the silence.